Dear Couple in the Subway Parking Lot,
Boy: Your girlfriend is waaaaaay out of your league. High fives all around, count your blessings and enjoy it while it lasts.
Girl: Why do you have a microwave from 1982 in your backseat? Also, clue in that you tell incredibly boring stories and your boyfriend is not dating you for your personality.
Love, Janny
Dear Bicyclist #1,
You look eerily like Tucker Carlson sans bow tie, remedy immediately.
Love, Janny
Dear Bicyclist #2,
Thank you for holding the door open for me, even though you were walking your bike. You did you mama and grandmama proud. You might actually convince me it is not a scientific fact but rather conjecture that teenage boys are stupid.
Love, Janny
Dear Man with the Weight Loss Lollipop Ad on Your Truck,
If you ever show your face I will knee you in the junk.
With not so much love,
Janny
Thursday, September 27, 2007
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2 comments:
Awesome letters, dude.
Thanks, I read them a second time and I think it is obvious I wrote them on the fly. Errors corrected and the peasants rejoiced.
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