Cure for the Common Cold

I discovered today the best way to stop a perpetually running nose and forget about sinus pain -- bikini wax. Getting my legs waxed when I feel achy and sore was a really bad idea. I was in so much pain the lady asked if it was my first time getting my legs waxed. Normally I sleep through it but today I was white knuckled and sweating from all the pain.

I am an evil, evil person.

I am so stupid. I made the mistake of eating these porcupines. Now my throat hurts.

Ouchie. I couldn't help myself, they were just so precious.

Tough Choice: Shia LaBeouf or Michael Cera

Boys of Summer: Will You Pick Shia or Cera? - Eonline Cool Stuff Blog

Note for Top Models

Yes, your family and friends will find out what you are doing because YOU ARE ON NATIONAL TV.


ETA: I apologize Potential Top Models for my sister's finickiness. I'm sorry, I'll use smaller words. Let me start again: I'm sorry girls that might be a top model in the future, my sister doesn't believe in you like I do. You will always be a top model in my heart.

I heart iGoogle

Google was starting to get jealous because Wikipedia was fast becoming my new BFF. Then along came iGoogle. Today I figure out how to add all of my most visited blogs. On stop shopping for all the websites I visit.


ETA: I realize that Google is slowly but surely becoming "the man". I love it anyway.

Proof of QoWP's Dorkiness

Actual phone conversation:
QWOP: "You know how it is, it is all about the Franklins"
Janny: "Huh? Did you say 'All about the Franklins'?"
QWOP: "Isn't that the saying?"
Janny: "You mean 'All about the Benjamins'?"
QWOP: "Great, I'm just like Bron saying 'lifting the roof'."
Janny: "Bron said 'lifting the ceiling'".
QWOP: "Oh, I can't even get that right."

Up the wall

There is this lady that I work with that is driving me crazy. People know me, I'm extremely patient with people who are technophobes. This women is in charge of the school newsletter but don't ask me why. Each month I start from scratch teaching her what to do. I have to upload pictures from HER camera, edit them, email them to her then show her how format the newsletter. I probably would have a better attitude if she would be a little nicer to me about all the help I give her.
Right now she is treating me like it is my fault that the newsletter has not gone out yet. Sorry, I don't have the convenience to work on these sort of things while my students are working. My students' work is a little more involved than colouring.
She even had the audacity to yell at me last month when she accidentally deleted the pictures. She asked me for the pictures again and I responded "Oh, you don't have the email anymore?" Apparently that is an offensive statement.

For the filmophile

National Society of Film Critics Poll - a ranking of movies based on critic's reviews.

Bad experimental TV

Wow, wow, wow. Why does anyone think this would be a good idea?

Writers for 'CSI Miami' and 'Two and a Half Men' consider switch

There are so many jokes that could be made but I am still too flabbergasted.

Random News Items

Is Prince Phillip an island god? - BBC News
The C.E.O. Crossword - NY Times Crossword with clues from Lee Iacocca.

Unfair

You can't tease a girl with a 5 day weekend then take it away. After I finished calling all of my students to inform them that there will be no school until Monday, our fearless leader decided that we will go back on Friday. Friday was supposed to be a half day but now it is a full day. I'm sure parents and students will be super impressed. I doubt I will have any students show up on Friday.

I thought I was going to get all this time to catch up on work and get resumes to send out. Nope, I have to be back at work by noon tomorrow to set up my classroom.

The Best Thing You'll See All Day (If You're a Lost or Kirk Cameron Fan)

Looking for the Ark...

This morning I went into school to take my books home and help with a bit of clean up. I do not have work for the rest of the week.
Storms flood streets, dump hail on Edmonton, Calgary - Canadian Press, June 6, 2007

Calgary lashed by wicked rainstorm: Chaos follows flash floods, lightning strikes -Sarah Chapman and Jamie Komarnicki, Calgary Herald Published: Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Getting Exactly What You Need

Today I probably had the worst day of my professional career. I have never witnessed such disharmony, low morale and unprofessionalism in my entire life. Students knew what was going on and it caused great chaos. I did not want to go to work tomorrow at all or for the rest of the school year. In all honesty, every morning I wake up and hope that the school is on fire or flooded, some valid reason I don't have to go into work.
This evening I planned on doing laundry but I really didn't want to stay at home. I really wanted to call up people, go out and do anything. I needed to get my mind off things. A good friend called me up ans asked if I wanted to go to a bookstore. I was so in.
In the meantime, Cowtown pretty well has a flash flood. There were stranded cars everywhere. I kept on saying that I hope the school flooded. Not even five minutes later my cell phone rang, it was my principal; the school was flooded with about a foot of water.
Sorry Calgarians for the downpour, God knew I needed the day off. Tomorrow I have to show up for work an hour later than usual for what I suspect is salvaging my books and schoolwork.

NY Times Movie Review: Breakfast at Tiffany's

The Screen: 'Breakfast at Tiffany's':Audrey Hepburn Stars in Music Hall Comedy By A.H. WEILER
Published: October 6, 1961

Old Familiar Tale of a Girl and Her Torn Ligament...

Seriously, I don't think I can spare anymore fingers. I went back to the doctor today for x-rays and as suspected there is not break. The nurse laughed at me again. I'm getting a reputation.

One student noticed that the splint on my finger was on a different hand. Before I could answer, students told her she was wrong but she was very right.


Good thing is it is doing much better and I can still shoot a basketball. Those are the things that matter in life.

Calling All Wordsmiths

How hard can it bee? Test your knowledge of words
- CBC, In Depth

Here I go again...

Remember how I tore a ligament in my pinky finger? Last night I was playing football and my right hand middle finger bent back at the knuckle trying to catch. In technical terms, I hyper-extended the proximal interphalangeal joint and I believe I tore the volar plate.

To summarize, I tore ligaments in two fingers on my dominant hand. I was so swollen and in so much pain last night I couldn't barely drive myself home. Good thing my car is automatic because I hand to put my car in drive with my left hand.

I dedicate the following poem to my "tall man" and "little Petter fiddler" -- sorry for being such a hater:

Tommeltott,
Slikkepott,
Langemann,
Gullebrand,
og Lille Petter Spillemann
- traditional Norwegian nursery rhyme

ETA: I just back from the doctor and my diagnosis was dead on. My finger is splinted in the neutral position and will remain that way for most of the summer. I really hope my pinky doesn't give me too many problems because I'll look like a freak with two splints. I'm supposed to go back for x-rays and re-examination when the swelling has gone down (and the lab is open). The doctor on call feared that it could be pretty serious.

Since this is the walk-in clinic where I get my allergy shot, the nurses know me and know that I came in with a torn ligament in my finger a couple weeks ago. They thought I had made it worse. They shook their heads when I explained it was a different finger on the same hand. I'm getting a reputation.

For the Pop Culturally Ignorant

Don't worry there isn't a problem with corruption in the Vancouver police department.


The Police are band who broke up in the mid-80s because they couldn't get along. Please don't take things so literally.

CBC is genius

So awesome to see a TV station that not only cares about ratings and revenue but also quality. Let's hope this will be a trend.

CBC-TV fine-tunes rating system - Guy Dixon, The Globe and Mail

"Known as PARC and detailed in a recent memo from CBC-TV executive vice-president Richard Stursberg to staff, the system gives all CBC shows a target number for their public value (P), expected audience (A), estimated revenues (R) and costs (C).

Public value is measured two ways: Shows are given a number on a 1-to-5 scale for their relative distinctiveness, and then audiences are surveyed to measure the shows' quality, Stursberg explained in an interview yesterday. He said this wasn't a response to any pressure from Ottawa to be more accountable but was a system he imposed to clarify the public broadcaster's goals in relation to its individual shows."

The Reigning Queen of Awesomeness

I bow to the aweseomeness of my sister, QWoP, on her prediction for America Next Top Model's winner. As promised, I would proclaim her greatness if she was right and I was wrong.

Skeletal Pop up

I lent a friend my laptop so she could edit some video. When she got it home and turned it on, an x-ray popped up and she could not get rid of it. A little creepy and confusing. The doctor gave me a CD of my x-rays and an examination program. I must have forgotten the CD in the drive.

The Beastie Boys might be onto something...

I let the students know that tomorrow my possible replacement will be teaching them a lesson. Reactions were not good at all. They are mostly upset that myself and many other teachers are not returning next year. One student described the situation as "No light at the end of the tunnel." Another student vowed to sabotage the lesson tomorrow. I was the teacher that taught him that losing his temper doesn't help anything. That is much more important than anything I could ever teach him in science.

The Preposturousness Continues

This is ridiculous. I helped interview a possible replacement for me last week. The director got the bright idea that the candidate should teach some lesson in several classes. Good idea in theory except I AM expected to prepare a lesson for her to teach. Wouldn't it be a good idea to see what she knows rather than what she can transmit?

Good News, Bad News

More than a month ago, I hurt my finger playing floor hockey. Of course being me, I didn't do anything about it.

About 10 days I went to the doctor with a considerable about of pain in my right pinky finger. The evening doctor was stuck in traffic so the nurse told me to put it in a splint. If it wasn't better in a week to come back and I would get x-rays.

Fast forward to Saturday when my finger was hurting even when it was in the splint. Before that it was pretty good. Sunday it was even worse and today on the way home from work I was nearly in tears.

The good news, as you can see, I do not have a fractured pinky. The bad news is I have a torn ligament that will take upwards of 3 months to heal. D'accord, d'accord.

Empty Open House

My school had its first ever open house and it was a rousing success with a total of 3 families showing up. The open house was 7 hours long so that works out to be about 0.43 fph.

Highlights from the day include:
- playing 2 student created games about the Soviet Union. (Surprisingly not a single questions about the proletariat or bourgeoisie.)
- on a dare shouting "I'm not from Toyko" at an unexpecting teacher. (Apparently I am such a random person she was completely unphased).
- laughing and nearly choking on a chicken wing
- Three Freudian slips (I read a question incorrectly: "Who was Rasputin and who did he do?")
- a lot of awesome conversation

Today was basically being paid to hang out with my friends. At least the day was not a complete waste.

Judging a Book by Its Cover

I love people watching. I love sitting from a distance and figuring out what is going on between two people. I think you figure out way more about what about relationships from not hearing a word. Actions speak louder than words, baby.

Enough of the preamble, the point of my story: I've been fascinated with two particular people lately. I noticed recently a male and female mirroring each others body language. The big question: who was mimicking who? I was too occupied at that time to figure it out what was exactly happening at the time. Overtime, I came to the conclusion that it was the female mirroring the male's actions. I think the female has a huge crush on the male but on further observation I don't think the feeling is reciprocated.

You may be thinking to yourself, why is Janny telling this vague story? If my conjectures are true, this is a HUGE thing. This is serious gossip that I am dying to tell but can't. Huge repercussions. I thought this was a good way to vent without telling tales. Sometimes I hate my own integrity.

Three Out of Four Ain't Bad

If you really want to look at it, I'm 11/12 in my NHL play-off prediction. I was not expecting New Jersey to play as poorly as they did. Oh well, still an impressive record.
I am having a hard time predicting the second round. A good prediction should be void of personal preference or emotion. The fact is that the remaining four teams are very strong and any could take it. It is strange there is no dark horse.
My dream final? Ottawa vs Detroit, with Detroit taking the Cup. Enough is enough -- Detroit needs to stop being the butt of playoff jokes. (Only second to Leaf jokes, we shan't be ridding ourselves of those anytime soon. ZING!)

Closing Pandora's Box

Pandora to restrict music service to U.S. listeners
Source: CBC.ca

You don't miss it unti it is gone

First it was the beoved period but I beat it into submission unti it returned. Now guess what etter doesn't want to work? Sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. I don't even notice it most of the time because the key does not hesitate. But the acking of it has taken me to some strange websites and made for some weird IM messages. I need a new aptop.

"'Tis but a scratch!"

Journey of a Fractured Pinkie
During a floor hockey game last month, some jerk hit me pretty hard with his stick. I'm a tough broad, I shook it off but I was pretty sore and bruised the next day. The littlest pressure even from writing or hole punching, I get bruised. Classic Janny: I help her team out and she ignores my pain. She is too busy to take care of her most valued player.

A week later, my pals and I were playing this crazy Korean pointing game. Janny was hitting me pretty hard on the table but she was having so much fun she ignored my pleading. I was in so much pain and I went numb. Janny was worried but hoped I would get better with time. I felt unloved.

A couple weeks went by, I was still numb but not in pain anymore. Foolishly, in attempt to occupy bored students, Janny taught them Jenkins Up. Jenkins Up, with me still numb? Is she mentally deficient or just sadistic? How could she put me through that? I have never been in so much pain in my entire life. I really left Janny know that I would not be ignored anymore.

She FINALLY took me to the doctor yesterday. The nurse told Janny to tape me up with a splint and if I'm not better by next week, I'll need X-rays. I feel better but every once in awhile I let Janny know how much she hurt me. This will not be forgotten anytime soon.

Doesn't Surprise Me

Gilmore Girls Has Been Canceled
Source: Eonline

Birthday Fun

I had a pretty good birthday celebration yesterday. Apparently there is some other secret plan for this week so this weekend I wanted to just take it easy to celebrate.
A small group of friends and I went for manicures and pedicures, a late lunch, shopping, then for cheesecake. It was a pretty good day.
This is the dress I bought yesterday:

I wore it to church today. I was a little paranoid it looks like a night gown but nobody else thought so.

If for only for the sake of fashion!

Swedish hospital may ban Crocs clogs due to static electricity

I'm glad to know that they are not only a fashion hazard.

The Demise of Stuart Little (aka One Crappy Day)

I returned from my vacation from workie to discover after no sightings for 4 months, my arch-nemesis the mouse has returned. Much to my chagrin, he brought a friend along. The repellers no longer worked so it was time to invest in some live traps.

My day started off finding a mouse that drown in my kitchen sink. Good times. Stupid mouse don't you realize you would be alive if you would have just gone in my live trap!!!! I convinced myself that I could get rid of it but I was sadly mistaken. I was convinced I never using my kitchen again.

While all of this was going on I was suffering from a fever and a great deal of pain form a wisdom tooth. My appointment was this morning to get it removed. As I was being prepped for the extraction, the assistant noticed I was fidgety. She asked me if I was nervous about the tooth being pulled. I responded "No, I'm just trying to figure out how to get a dead mouse out of my kitchen sink." It is sad when tooth extraction is a bright spot in your day.

I went over to my cousin's for a bit after my tooth was pulled. She suggested that a repairman that was going to be coming to my place tonight. He was more than happy to. I feel so much more relaxed now that is out of the sink. One down, one to go....

I Knew It!

Your results:
You are Wonder Woman
You are a beautiful princess
with great strength of character.



Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

Why I Adore Laineygossip

The Freebie Five : what I love best of all? She understands my love for Prince Harry.

Stanley Cup: the Revision

Thank you Derek for pointing out my error. Once in a lifetime opportunity: Derek you were right, I messed up the bracket. I blame stupid CBS who apparently doesn't know how the playoffs work.

Here is my new prediction yet the outcome is relatively the same:

Edit of another glaring error: I realized that I accidentally put the wrong prediction for the Buffalo - New York series. Rangers? You got to be kidding me.

I Heart Tim Gunn

Fashion & Style
The Headmaster of Fashion
By ERIC WILSON
Published: April 12, 2007
Tim Gunn is the real breakout star of “Runway.” Can he tutor Liz Claiborne?

Lord Stanley's Cup Prediction

I know my readership of 3 people don't care about hockey but I felt my prediction needed to be a matter of public record for the naysayers.

- this is the year for Detroit to not choke in the first round (I commission them to thoroughly spank the Flames in the first round)
- Vancouver will do the best out of any Canadian team but won't make it to the final.
- No matter what happens, a team from the East will win the cup.

Another Reason Why I'll Never Get a Man

Source:
What Makes You Click? — Mate Preferences and Matching Outcomes in Online Dating (Günter J. Hitsch , Ali Hortaçsu, Dan Ariely)

Apparently I don't make enough money to be attractive to men.

Eating worms

As my sister already mentioned, my dad is in the hospital again. I haven't felt like blogging in a long time.

In other news, I pretty well have the plague. So I'm feeling extremely attractive and itchy.

I changed my profile picture to a young, less jaded Janny.

Boys are Dumb

I got my hair cut and dyed last Thursday. It was Monday when finally a male noticed that my hair was not longer nearly down to my waist but just below my shoulders. You can tell his wife has trained him well.
I'm not mad because no guys noticed or said anything about my hair. I'm mad because they never notice or say anything! Idiots. The men I see on a regular basis are not the oblivious type. I've heard them compliment other women. They do it all the time. So why in the world do I hear nothing? Idiots, the whole lot of them. Do you know what I do hear? That I look like a horse and my stories about banshees are lame.
OK, don't tell me that it doesn't matter what they think or say, blah, blah, blah. It does. Compliments from guys carry more weight.
I heard that it takes at least three positive comments to counteract a negative one. I think I'm still running on a deficit from high school. It's hard to overcome names like "Ugly Kid Janice" or boys teasing each other about waiting to date me like it was a disgusting thing.
Yes, I know I have issues.

Crossing over to the Dark Side...

I got the Google blogger account. I was waiting for it to not be in beta.

Where's Shaun when you need him?

Mom, you may not want to read this one. Trust me, you'll only raise your eyebrows and worry about your oldest daughter.

Last week, I had a dream that my sister and I had to share a room with the body of my recently deceased grandma the night before the funeral. My sister and I were on bunk beds (Me on the top and Mary on the bottom, just like old times) and grandma was laying on a single bed across the room. In the middle of the night grandma got out of bed. Mary was so freaked out she jumped onto the top bunk. We stayed as still as possible so "zombie grandma" would not see us. (I woke up after she left the room. I cannot verify if she was actually a zombie).

Like I was not freaked out enough that I had to attend my grandma's viewing.

Be Careful What You Ask for...

Or you might have a homeless and drunk and/or mentally ill man fall in love with you.

A couple months ago a friend that own a custom dress shop asked me to do some modeling for an event. At the time I was sure if I should take "You're tall and relatively good looking" as an insult. After my first fitting I found out there would be two other girls as well. After my last fitting I was told that I would not have to be at the event all day but only for the afternoon. My ego was little bruised after I was first publicly declared the "backup" then told she was going to only use the other two girls. I still went to the event anyway because I wanted to support my friend.

On my way home, my friends and I were waiting for a train when a homeless guy walked up to me. He was staring at me and I was convinced that he was going to ask for money. He would not take his eyes off of me then he started repeating over and over "I like the one with the glasses." We bolted.

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"Cooking up my B.A."

The Post that Never Happened

After hearing that my flight had been by over 2 hours, my sister called to remind me about an unsecure wireless network in the Regina airport. I was going to write a post triumphantly boosting of my free Internet when I lost the signal. Oh well, I had it for awhile.

As I sit and type I am three seats away from a man listening to the worst music I'm sure I have ever heard. How dreadful. Does he not know if other people can hear the words of your music that either your headphones are crappy and/or you are listening to them too loudly?

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Watch out Bron

A couple days ago, one of my favourite words uxorious was Dictionary.com's word of the day. One of my goals in life is to be able to use it in Scrabble. I shall ride my pony when I do.

I'm ashamed it is true....

The Sonnet Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDf) Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed? Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They're conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that's okay, because you're very choosy with your affections anyway. You'd absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance. Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You're already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there's no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so. You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls. ALWAYS AVOID: The 5-Night Stand, The False Messiah, The Hornivore, The Last Man on Earth CONSIDER: The Loverboy Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

Queasy Canadiens can’t wait to put pesky flu bug behind them

My beloved Habs are on a 3 game losing streak due to the flu. Poor guys. Against the Capitals they had guys puking between periods.
Is there a doctor in the house?

The Fall of Hippolyta

I arrived home Saturday evening. I was getting a glass of water before bed and I noticed dirt on the kitchen floor. Hippolyta, my cactus, was on the floor, her terra cotta pot shattered in pieces. I didn't dare move her until I had another pot to put her into.
The next day I went out and got her a pot she could grow into. As I was cleaning up the kitchen, I could tell a mouse knocked over the cactus. I had unplugged my mouse repeller before I went away and forgot to plug it in again. Now I can barely move the new pot so I doubt a mouse could. I had planned to repot her in the spring since she had grown almost too big for her pot (about 2 feet tall above the pot). Normally a mouse would not be able to knock over a plant that big if it wasn't already so top heavy.
Interesting note: the terra cotta pot left "shrapnel" in the floor boards. The ledge the pot was sitting on was over 5 feet high and obviously hit the ground pretty hard.

Strange Bowling Coincidences

This afternoon I made plans to see a friend from high school. It is very difficult to make plans with him for several reasons:
- He is an insomniac and has to keep to a very strict evening routine so he does not "socialize" in the evening.
- He lives very, very far away so I rarely see him.
- He is about 3 millimetres away from becoming a hermit.
- He is a germaphobe.
- He takes over twenty minutes to brush his teeth (see previous point).
Originally I had planned we should go for a walk. He likes going for walks especially since there are very few people and he can keep his gloves on (for fear of germs). Today was much colder than it has been the last couple days so that was out.
My next suggestion was bowling. Yikes! From the dirty look I got you would think I had suggested an assassination. He was leery about the rented shoes touching bowling balls that other people had used. Fortunately I have the ability to convince him to do things he normally would not do. First, I convinced him just to drive to the bowling alley. I wasn't even sure if the place even would be open in the middle of the afternoon on a week day. When we saw people leaving the building we knew it was open and he seemed incredibly disappointed. I promised him that he can wash his hands and his socks. He told me he might have to throw out his socks (I thought he was joking but he was not).
After about his fourth strike in a row, he admitted to me he used to be in a bowling league. Upon further investigation I found out he had been in a youth bowling league for several years during the same time that I bowled. We even bowled at the same time but did not met until 10 years later. (Our high school was very big and we did not met until the last day of grade 11).
We had lots of fun and once we started bowling he didn't even freak out about anything.

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Norwegian Delight

My mama and I made krum kaga yesterday (also sometimes know as krumkake). I got her an iron for Christmas. It took FOREVER! No wonder my grandma only makes it once a year. Here are our amatuer results:

Not too shabby.

Writer's convention

Sorry that during the last couple weeks I have not been posting much. I had a presentation at a writer's convention and I was swamped with work. Finally after the holidays, they posted pictures from the conference. Check out what they said about me:

I have no idea how I was able to pay attention.

Move Over George Clooney

Salon made their own list of sexiest men alive and "nary a pretty-boy actor among them".
Agreed and agreed.

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Little Joey

From Eonline

A couple thoughts:
1) Brooke Shields' son is awesome
2) Why is Brooke Shields wearing a denim skirt as a jacket?
3) Why is Brooke Shields' son under her denim skirt?

Ky Could Be Hazardous to Your Health

Did you know that Ky is the leading cause of house fires?

Because she's smokin'.

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Little Mosque on the Prairies

I've never heard of a Canadian show getting so much buzz from out of the country before.
CNN to visit 'Little Mosque' set
I've seen the commercials and I definitely want to see it.

Belted sweaters and misogyny

From the Manolo:
Don’t Like Women? You’ll Love Our Sweaters

Janny the Snob?

There is a possibility that I am cool. Chuck Klosterman argues that cereal commercials teaches kids that elitism is the same thing as being cool. By that logic, for the first time in my life, I am part of the "in crowd".

For the first time in my teaching career, not only do I have several coworkers my own age, I have a lot in common with them. There are 5 of us that range in age from 28 to 32 that all teach high school. We started by going out to lunch together on professional development days or supper when we had parent-teacher interviews. We normally congregate in one teacher's classroom on Friday mornings for a "staff "meeting" (weeks more often than that). It has gotten to the point where if one of us cannot be found, they know exactly where to look.

A couple weeks ago, one of my friends invited me to her house for a "staff" Christmas party. A official party had not been planned by the social committee so she decided to throw her one. I was told to keep the party a secret since not everyone on staff would be invited. I didn't even have to ask her who was invited or not, I already knew.

There is two ways I can look at things:
1) You can't fault us for being friends and spending time outside of work. We get along with everyone but you can't expect us to be friends with everyone.
2) The above argument sounds exactly like someone trying to make excuses for being part of a clique. It isn't like we make an effort to include other people.

Bad Blogger Mommy

I'm sorry, I have not updated since November 29th. I've been neglecting my blog. I've been sick with a cold for nearly two weeks and working like crazy.
Please forgive me.

I'd rather run into Zach

So a couple times I've ran into Dustin Diamond incognito and his apparent BFF Harry Knowles (of Ain't It Cool News) on the train. I'm pretty sure they are studying to be computer engineers at Devry. Screech was wearing aviator glasses when it was pitch dark outside. Either he was trying to be in disguise or he really loves Corey Hart. Neither would surprise me.

***Mary, these are even more dead on descriptions than "12 year old Icelandic boy", "Jesus-looking dude" or "pimp janitor".

Kid Rock has really gone down hill

On MSN Today:


This is my theory:
1) MSN does not have access to any pictures of Kid Rock and Pam Anderson
2) They only have pictures of Pam Anderson with Doyle Brunson (which is understandable, why would you want a picture WITHOUT Doyle Brunson).
3) MSN does not have any photo editing software to remove Doyle Brunson and copy and paste Kid Rock in

Life Rants

Why do I keep on having dreams about over sleeping and missing work? On the weekend I dreamed that I was sleepy during my prep period so I decided to close my eyes for a couple minutes. In my dream I woke up at home in my bed 4 days later. I'm so tired these days even in my dreams I am sleepy.

I have come to the conclusion that Calgarians talk big but are really big wusses. For the past couple days it has been between -20 and -30C. Not a big deal for a girl from Saskatchewan but for anyone else, it gets below -5C and they don't know how to cope. The kids were trying to convince the principal to call a weather day. YOU LIVE IN CANADA YOU IDIOTS, DEAL WITH IT! I do admit it is harder to drive in Calgary than most places in Saskatchewan. When I was on my way home last night (a trip that took me 1:45) and there were lots of cars that couldn't get up hills on the slippery roads.

An add to my story yesterday about putting the plug on my block heater: my landlord did it wrong. When I woke up on Monday it started like it wasn't even plugged in. I think something was loose because the plug fell right off. Late last night I drove my car around so it would start in the morning.

Janny's Blog: Singer in Disguise

What is going on? An Elvis Stojko hater has started a bit of controversy on my blog.
Janny's Blog: Singer in Disguise

Changing Plugs or How Ky Will Be Framed for My Murder

I had a truly craptacular day yesterday.
Stupid, silly me did not deal with getting my plug replaced for my block heater when the weather was nice. Yesterday my car barely started and I didn't want to wreck my car battery so I had to deal with it. (Please note that I was tired and not feeling well).
First I made some phone calls to find a garage where I could work. Either people were not home or not available. It was still daylight so I decided to take my chances to work on it outside. After buying the necessary materials and receiving specific instructions from my dad, I bundled up and got to work.
The old plug was impossible to remove. The screws and wires were pretty rusted so I eventually just cut the cord above the plug. My dad told me that there will be insulated wires coloured white, black and green, however there was only green so this confused me. After many phone calls back and forth I finally was able to get back to work again.
The insulation was striped away and I was ready to attach the wires when I discovered that I had not exposed enough of the wires. It about -33C with the windchill and the insulation was very difficult to cut. My utility knife slipped and I cut my finger pretty badly. I ran inside, put on a band aid and then finished removing the insulation. As I was screwing a wire tight, I realized that the inside of my mitten was completely wet. I took it off and my entire hand was cover in blood. I ran inside, cleaned off my hand and waited for the bleeding to stop before going back out again.
Returning to my work, I discovered I had attached the wrong wire to the wrong screw (it was getting dark). I had to undo my work and start over again. I tried to start over again but my hands were so cold I couldn't do anything. I went back inside and tried to make some more calls again to see if I could find a garage. I still could not get a hold of anyone so I went back out to finish the job with a flashlight. With the flashlight I saw that one of the wires had been cut through so I was going to have to start all over again. Do you know what does not help when you are working outside in the cold? Huge crocodile tears rolling down your face. I went inside to calm down and warm up. By the time I went back outside, my landlord came home and he let me use his garage. He even helped me to put the plug on.
I was very confused when I got inside and there was red paint all over my screwdriver. I looked closer and realized it was bloody fingerprints. Good thing the light was dim in the garage or my landlord would have noticed he was using a bloody screwdriver.

***Note: The reason Ky would be framed for my murder is she can seem suspicious even if she didn't do anything.

I am such a dork. I was eating choclates after parent teacher interviews and I drooled all the way down my shirt in front of half the staff.

I came to the realization a couple days ago that the students from my homeroom during my first year of teaching turned 22 this year. Any who went to university right after high school have convocated.

I ran into a student from my first homeroom earlier this week. She has her degree in business administration and is working for a securities firm downtown. Former students are grown ups, I am so old. Despite making me feel old, it was nice to see her. She is genuinely one of the nicest people I have ever met in my entire life. Teaching would be so easy if I had more students like her.

Fun with Clocks

Let me preface that I know I am old and I go to bed way too early.

The other night I went to bed at 10 pm and my alarm was set to go off at 5:25 am. I woke up at 10:58 very confused why I over slept by that much and my alarm clock did not go off. Tired, I force myself out of bed and into the bathroom to shower. It took me a couple minutes to realize it was way too dark outside for 11 am and realized I had only slept an hour.

Little Known Metal Facts

I was looking up Iron on Wikipedia and found this:


I never know one of the properties of iron was Charley Turton's smelliness.
I went back this afternoon and it was gone.

Report Card Aftermath

See if this makes sense to you:
I have a female student who does not do her homework, does not write down notes, does not study and does not ask for help. She has failed every test this year so far. All she has managed to accomplish is passing notes to her friends. She was surprised that she is failing. What? She blames me that she failing. She thinks I have something against her. She's a nice girl but she doesn't do anything in class. I have nothing against her.

The report cards were handed out on Friday and today she was displaying a serious hostile attitude towards me. A boy in the class with a similar mark as her got upset with her for blaming me for her failure. At least he admits he deserves the grade he has.

Students have such a warped sense of the reality of school. I don't give grades, they earn grades. It has nothing to do with how much I like them but to how well they know the content of the curriculum. Math and science grades are not subjective. It all boils down to a generation that does not take responsibility for their own actions.

What European City Do You Belong In?

You Belong in Paris

You enjoy all that life has to offer, and you can appreciate the fine tastes and sites of Paris. You're the perfect person to wander the streets of Paris aimlessly, enjoying architecture and a crepe.

What European City Do You Belong In?

New School Picture

We had retakes this week and here is my new proof. I haven't decided yet if I want to order any.


(The small text says our guest lecturer is discussing the ramifications of bustin' heads.)

Into the Mind of Janny

I had a dream that I was Veronica Mars two nights ago. It was just like it was a continuation of the show, I was on the same case as her and it even had an end of show cliffhanger. I don't want to describe the case I was working on because I don't want to spoil anything for people that haven't seen the real show.

I was given a tip there was a clue in a locker in the girls' change room. I was trying to vindicate someone who had been falsely accused of a crime. The locker didn't actually belong to anyone and I had to use cryptology to open the lock (although I don't know why I just didn't cut the lock). Seconds before the person was arrested, I found my clue . For some reason the male football coach arrested a boy in the girls' change room. I don't know why either of them were there but it made sense in my dream. The other strange part was that the change room had no exterior walls. ANYWAY, the coach wouldn't listen to me about the evidence I found so I headbutted him in the back. He continued to walk away then collapsed a couple yards away. I shouted to the crowd that had formed for the perp walk, "Hey, all I did was head butt him!" Then fade to black.

I want to be sedated

I feeling punching everyone and everything. The lowlights of the day:
A student threw a temper tantrum because his ex-girlfriend DID NOT key his car. She stood by his car and there are no marks on it. Yet he is convinced that she damaged it. I don't key his car all the time and he has never once got upset with me.
The photocopier hates me. Either it jams or only photocopies the first page multiple times. I tried to make overhead transparencies and it warped them. At student came up to me and asked me if he could help. As I walked with him to class "Not unless you have a baseball bat or dynamite."
Yes, I did take an extra doughnut from the staff room. You snooze, you lose and get a bran muffin. If you have a problem with that you can fight me for it.
I'm going home and watching Crapmore Girls.

Now I just need someone to love my sassiness...

I don't know if it is from my obsession with Veronica Mars but I tricked a student into a confession today. I was awesome. All I had was a student who might have seen something and the principal said this wasn't enough. I privately confronted one student and I spoke just like I saw the whole thing. He admitted to it and that's all I needed. I rule. Unfortunately my awesomeness is overshadowed by the fact that I had two students cheat.

Let's Do the Time Warp Again

Ok, ok, I realize that the last time I posted the internet had just been invented. Shoot me, I've nothing to talk about. All I do is work. This is what my blog would look like if I had posted:
Oct 23
Went home from work, watched TV, prepared chemistry lessons then when to bed early.
Oct 24
Went home from work, watched TV, prepared chemistry lessons then when to bed early.
Oct 25
Went home from work, watched TV, prepared chemistry lessons then when to bed early.
....
You get the point. My life is repetitively boring.

This past weekend I went to a Halloween party. I dressed up again as a swing kid but this time it was even more historically accurate. I drew lines up the back of my legs just like they did back in the day when there were no nylons. I was super cute.

After supper and games, we went 5-pin bowling. I was so excited. I love bowling with all my heart and soul. At first I wasn't doing that well since I was bowling in a dress. I lost my sympathy after bowled 4 strikes in a row.

Because we are not allowed to dress up in costumes at my school so we had a pajama day instead. I wore my Super Girl jammies. You'd think any day where you wear Super Girl jammies to school would be super awesome but it wasn't. It is Halloween and the boys were more stupid than normal. (Boys ages 12 - 17 are significantly more stupid then any other age range, it's science).

I'm weak for fashion

In Canada, Project Runway is a couple weeks behind the original airing. So it is really hard to be surprised. I knew the finale was aired last night. I tried to be strong and not find out but I was overcome by temptation. Oh well, I'll still watch it even though I know who wins.

Pop Culture Amiss

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who hated last night's Gilmore Girls. I agree, Snakes on the Plane references are so August 19th.
Snakes on a 'Gilmore' girl

The Punches Keep on Rolling

The last two nights in a row, I have gone to bed 2.5 hours later than usual because I had too much work to do for school. Last night I was nearly in tears with frustration trying to write a chemistry test. I just wanted to go to bed.

This morning when I got to school my computer would not boot up. A bunch of marking that I was going to do before school did not get done because the answer key was on the computer and I did not get the new one done in time. Most of the documents on the computer were backed up on a memory stick. The only thing that I can't recover is the class attendance since the beginning of the year. I can recreate as best I can from this week but I can't remember beyond that.

The combination of not getting enough sleep and all the chaos that followed left me frazzled all day.

There is something going on at the school right now but I'm not sure what. About a half hour after school dismissed, several students returned. They are all being interviewed by a police officer. I can only hear bits and pieces and it is only making me more curious.

Older than I Look

The general consensus of staff and students is that I look like a high school student. You would think 10 years after I finished high school I would look different. Of course wearing sparkly union flag shirts does not help.

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Pukefest 2006

I'm paranoid I'm getting the flu. In the past two days I have had 3 separate students running out of the classroom to throw up. It is a bit of an epidemic in the school right now.

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Blah

I feel so defeated. I was marking quizzes last night and I suspect 4 students cheated. How could I not have noticed? These students frustrate me so much.

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Immodesty Abounds

Where did women get the idea that it is attractive to wear pants so tight you could see their future grandchildren ?

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Crazy Train

If you want to know the general mental health of a certain population, ride public transit.

Tuesday morning, while waiting for the train to arrive, a man was tackling a pillar repeatedly. Excuse me, sir, that pillar is not going anywhere.

A couple stops later, man came into the train car telling himself loud, boisterous, nonsensical stories. Occasionally he laugh uproariously at what he said. There is something unsettling about one person laughing loudly when no one else is talking.

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Like a Record, Baby

Of course I have to get sick on my only long weekend before Christmas. I wouldn't have it any other way. This afternoon I was working on report car marks and I was feeling pretty tired. I wanted to have a short nap but 2.5 hours later my brother woke me up.
When I got out of bed the whole room was spinning. I have not been this dizzy since I was about 6 years old and experienced the worst flu of my life. I only got out of bed so I could visit with my family while my brother was over. My mommy went out and bought me some gravol. I feel better but not great. I can at least sit upright.

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Into the Mind of Janny

I am such a dork that last night I had to nap at 10:30 pm so I could make the rest of the 1.5 hour trip back to my parent's house. This is from a girl who for the past 6 years had a hard time getting to bed before 1 am. My how the times have changed. I go to bed at 10 pm and that is too late for me. I really wish I could be in bed with the lights off by 9:30 pm. May I reiterate? I am such a dork.

I have lots of experience traveling long hours by myself. It amuses me the things I do to entertain myself on long trips:
- think of new and witty comebacks for all occasions
- imagining this big jock dude doing an interpretive dance to poetry. (He should have never told me about that assignment from university. I am offering a reward of my first born child, 1 million dollars and my wooden wiener dog book ends for anyone that can track down the tape).
- yelling out road signs in a monster-truck-commercial-announceresque voice. "Thunder Creek Road! Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!"
- practicing the song "Radar Love". It drives me crazy that I accidentally sing "nude sunrise" instead of "new sunrise".

I make myself laugh.

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Blast from the Past

Space has started showing episodes of The Hilarious House of Frightenstein. So Awesome.

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Clean Machine

I had a rip roaring time this weekend. My big excitement included cleaning the Venetian blinds, kitchen and bathroom. I also managed to be in bed before 11 every night and up before 7. Tonight to cap off my big weekend, I will be in bed by 10. I am the life of the party.

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Scientific Time Efficiency

I was doing last minute lesson planning when I realized that my entire grade 12 Physics class is in my Chemistry class. I was planning to review that same basic principles of science in both classes but what's the point? Why teach the same group of students the same thing twice? I'm just going to go on with the next lesson.

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Important science lesson

16 inches is very different than 16 centimetres.

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Dollar Store Bargains

My school is by the best dollar store EVER! Honestly everything is a dollar or less. For school I bought for less than $22.

• 7 measuring tapes


• 2 boxes of tissues


• 5 bags of marbles


• 4 stackable storage boxes


• 2 rolls or masking tape

Bargin.

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Tattling Students and Strange Co-Workers

I'm a little annoyed right now. Earlier this week I had 4 students show up 5 minutes before class was over. They are upset that they were marked absent and not let into class. You're kidding me, right? They were so upset they went and complained to the school director. Among there other complaints: sometimes I make mistakes when working out math, chemistry or physics problems.

****Newsflash: Janny is not perfect and sometimes makes mistakes.******

These kids are ridiculous. The director called me into his office to tell me I need to let the students know that teachers make mistakes too. I seriously have to tell them that? That is something they don't know?

On a less annoying but more curious note, one of my co-workers has been acting strange all morning. Whenever he sees me, he stops, looks right at me and says nothing. If I ask him what he is doing, he says nothing. It is a little unsettling.

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Weirdest Thing I've Yelled at the TV in a Long Time

"For serious? A beret? You have to be kinding me."

Thanks Roger, now "for serious" is part of my everyday speech. I started out using it as a joke now it I started using it for serious.

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The Busy Just Got Busier

Yesterday I was asked to coach the junior girls basketball team. I teach at a small school and there has never been enough interest by female students for a girls' team. I have never coached basketball by myself before. At my previous school, a community member coached the team and I helped out. Legally a teacher has to be present at all practices and games.

I'm glad that girls are showing interest in sports at this school (whose population is predominately Muslim). However, right now I barely have enough time to sleep and eat with my schedule. I have yearbook meetings starting today and basketball starting in a couple weeks. I might possibly die.

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Useless

This afternoon was a complete bust. I taught my lessons but it was impossible to get the students to work on what they were supposed to. These were the questions they asked me this afternoon:

1) How much cobalt-60 is needed to make a nuclear bomb?

2) What is cancer? How does cancer start? Why isn't there a cure for cancer?, etc

3) "Why did some dude invent pi?"

4) How do we know that these formulas [sic] are right?

5) Why did they decide how to arrange the periodic table?

6) "Were swears the same way back when you were in high school?"

There were many other questions relating to a belief that all the sciences were a mass conspiracy that nothing was actually true. As one student put it "There is no one someone could have figure that out."

It was only Wednesday, I hate to see what they are like on Friday.

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Hope for the best

My expensive graphing calculator went missing and I fear a student might have stole it. I never leave my class unlocked so it doesn't make sense. I really hoping I just put it somewhere weird and it will turn up.

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Welcome Wagon

Only one more sleep until Veronica Mars. I may burst with excitement.

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Bad Teacher

I "borrowed" a garden gnome on Saturday night.  I took part in a scavenger hunt at a birthday party and the item said "a lawn ornament".  I only hope it is returned or that would be stealing.

Today I bent my glasses with a Donkey Kong (spinning) top.  My glasses were sitting on the table and the top got a little out of control.  I confiscated the top from a student now it is all mine.  Of course, I only use it for very scientific purposes. I love double standards. 

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