Inconsolable

I'm tired and I'm discouraged. Part of it is frustration from school. Part of it is feeling very unattractive. Part of it is feeling left behind and left out. Part of it is being frustrated that I'm sick so often. The worst of it is sometimes my best efforts aren't good enough. I need a good sleep. I don't know if it is all the anti-histamines I've been taking but I've had nightmares 3 nights in a row:

The first night, I dreamt I woke up and there was a child standing by my bed watching me sleep. In my dream I didn't believe it was actually happening so I forced myself awake.

The next night, I dreamt there was a dragon attacking my house. I was a hobbit and I ran down to my cellar to hide. There were all these other hobbits in my cellar and they appointed me king. As king, it was my job to get rid of the dragon. Just as I was going up the stairs of the cellar, the dragon came crashing into my house. His head got a little stuck in the cellar door so I cut off his hand and slashed his throat before he could get free. I then stabbed him in the heart to make sure he was dead. The cellar was filling up with his blood and we all ran towards the small window to escape. Then I woke up.

Last night I hiked to the top of a really steep hill. I was taking pictures and the hill started shaking. The hill was an active volcano that was starting to erupt. I ran down the hill as fast as I could. As I reached the bottom I turned around to watch lava start pouring down the sides. I wasn't watching where I was going and I tripped. Then I woke up.

Even though I woke up terrified, thinking about me being the dragon slaying king of the hobbits is making me laugh. You see this ridiculous brain I'm dealing with? If only I could get it to figure out how fast water is flowing between concentric pipes (AKA fluid mechanics question that made me cry).