Happy Anniversary Mom & Dad!

Things not to do on the eve of your birthday

I wanted to spend the evening getting rid of the clothes I never wear anymore. I had to get rid of my favourite dress.

Me getting ready to present my homeroom class with plaques at grad.

I thought purging my closet would be a good way to start my 32nd year. It mostly made me feel terrible about myself. I had to get rid of three garbage bags full of clothes that no longer fit. It is a reminder that I'm not as skinny, pretty and young as I used to be. Worst of all, it is a reminder of how broke I am to not be able to replace these clothes for a long time. Lack of money just reminds me of the fact I still have not found a job.

Bob Loblaw

One Bad Dream Ah Ah Ah

I'm starting doubt my father's theory that my recent nightmares have to do with watching too many scary movies. Last night I dreamt I was attacked by The Count outside my grandparents' barn.

Here we go

Since spring sprung early, I've been having problems with migraines. Since I started my allergy shots 10 years ago, the severity and frequency decreased dramatically. For the times when I did get them, my family doctor at the time suggested trying 2 acetaminophen and 2 ibuprofen before he would prescribe anything stronger. This worked for the most part up until the last couple months. What worked before lessened the symptoms at best. I was living with a migraine for about 3 weeks (Mom, correct me if I have the length of time wrong).

I finally saw my family doctor about 2 weeks ago*. She prescribed Naproxen** twice a day until I see her next month and massage therapy. She gave me a trial of rizatriptan benzoate to take at the first symptoms of a migraine. I've been taking the Naproxen for two weeks, had my second massage therapy appointment today and just had to take my first dose of rizatriptan benzoate a couple minutes ago. Let's see how this works.


*Took that long to get an appointment with her
** Basically a stronger version of Aleve

Get this woman her own show!

All I remember from my dream

is Ky punctuating everything she said with "hut cha CHAAA".

Behold, Betty White (with a special appearance by centaur John Ritter)

Two separate people today thought: "Hey, Janice is my source for Bea Arthur wrestling dinosaurs maybe she wants to branch out to other Golden Girls."

This week's Portland Mercury cover:

Because I'm classy

Hilarious and adorable.

You can't argue with science

According to Stupid Fight:

Not Justin Bieber

I realize that I'm nearly 32 year old and not exactly up on teen culture but



I know there is no way that is Justin Bieber.

"I'd like a single plum floating in perfume served in a man's hat."

Sit Down, Shut Up - Arnett vs. Bateman

2010 NHL Stanley Cup Prediction: Updated

Sigh, the things I do instead of homework.....



Please forgive, I didn't have much time to make the bracket image. Hopefully I'll have time to improve it by next round (and talk about my rational). It is unfair that hockey playoffs coincide with finals. Two years ago, I asked my doctor if she could write me a note to excuse me from finals until the hockey season was over -- she was not amused.


Add: James Cybulski of TSN made the exact same prediction as me. That has to count for something? Exact same logic as I (if you care).

Champion!

If only I could translate this into not pretend success...

Pleasant Picture Before Bed

On the job
Originally uploaded by star5112

ADORABLE!

Mouse Toilet (or things I say when I'm tired)

Alana, James and I ordered appetizers to share at a restaurant. After the waitress brought our plates, I explained that they always give their customers "mouse toilets". (Certainly something you would not want to clean your hands with). As Alana pointed out, I "traded diphthongs":
mouse toilet: ˈmaus ˈtoi-lət
moist towelette: ˈmoist tau-(ə-)ˈlet
(My apologies that the pronunciations are not written out correctly, I can't figure out how to do all the characters in html).

The last time we hung out, I had to backtrack on a story with
"Oh wait, not Morgan Freeman... I meant the Hulk." Understandable mistake since they are often confused.

Test Anxiety

Test anxiety USUALLY occurs before or during a test. I get test anxiety after the test (or assignment) I did poorly on. I think there is an expectation from others that I will do really well. I worry that others will be disappointed when I do poorly.

Yesterday, I wrote two lab finals and they did not go great. The exams were back to back for a total of 3 hours. The very first question on my first exam I had to set up an AC circuit with a light bulb. We only had 15 minutes to collect data and I could not get my ammeter to display anything. My lab instructor pointed out my cables where in the wrong inputs for an ammeter. Once I finally had things set up properly, I had so little time for data collection it left me completely frazzled for the rest of the morning.

Last night and today, I'm stressing out about the tests. Mistakes I made keep going over and over in my head.

Oliver Cromwell, Lord Protector of England (Puritian)

Ugh, more nightmares

Two nights ago, after I wrote my last blog post about nightmares, I was too tired to remember my dreams. So what made me wake up in a cold sweat early this morning? Zombie apocalypse*. I will spare the very gruesome** details but you didn't know who was a zombie until they attacked. The only other non-zombie was a female chef I didn't like*** and we had to learn to work together.







*Interesting Janny stat: this is the 6th zombie related post. Might explain a few things.
** I accidentally typed gruelsome the first time.
*** Not a real person but the chef part was integral to her skill set in my dream.

Inconsolable

I'm tired and I'm discouraged. Part of it is frustration from school. Part of it is feeling very unattractive. Part of it is feeling left behind and left out. Part of it is being frustrated that I'm sick so often. The worst of it is sometimes my best efforts aren't good enough. I need a good sleep. I don't know if it is all the anti-histamines I've been taking but I've had nightmares 3 nights in a row:

The first night, I dreamt I woke up and there was a child standing by my bed watching me sleep. In my dream I didn't believe it was actually happening so I forced myself awake.

The next night, I dreamt there was a dragon attacking my house. I was a hobbit and I ran down to my cellar to hide. There were all these other hobbits in my cellar and they appointed me king. As king, it was my job to get rid of the dragon. Just as I was going up the stairs of the cellar, the dragon came crashing into my house. His head got a little stuck in the cellar door so I cut off his hand and slashed his throat before he could get free. I then stabbed him in the heart to make sure he was dead. The cellar was filling up with his blood and we all ran towards the small window to escape. Then I woke up.

Last night I hiked to the top of a really steep hill. I was taking pictures and the hill started shaking. The hill was an active volcano that was starting to erupt. I ran down the hill as fast as I could. As I reached the bottom I turned around to watch lava start pouring down the sides. I wasn't watching where I was going and I tripped. Then I woke up.

Even though I woke up terrified, thinking about me being the dragon slaying king of the hobbits is making me laugh. You see this ridiculous brain I'm dealing with? If only I could get it to figure out how fast water is flowing between concentric pipes (AKA fluid mechanics question that made me cry).

I forgot about Uncle Kool-Aid

I might be procrastinating from homework but this morning's post inspired me to read Wikipedia's article on SNL animal sketches:
Facts About Brian Fellow

• Brian Fellow was once bit by a snapping turtle. Ever since then, he seems to have an irrational fear of any kind of turtle.


• Brian Fellow was once attacked by a pigeon.


• Brian Fellow has a friend named Jessie, who fixes cars.


• Brian Fellow has a friend named Angel, who likes to name birds.


• Brian Fellow has a strange fear and hatred of goats.


• Brian Fellow has a clean mouth. There is no talk of the birds and the bees on his show, except when there are birds or bees, and sometimes, not even then.


• Brian Fellow has an Uncle Kool-Aid who often wears a big belt buckle.


• Brian Fellow does not like porcupines.


• Brian Fellow has a brother named Ryan Fellow.

Brian Fellow's remarks on animals

• On a boa constrictor: "That's one big worm!" or "Does the snake still work for the Devil?"


• On a Sphynx (cat): "What'd you do to that cat? He bald-headed!"


• On a tarantula: "That's one fuzzy bug! ...If I had a bug like that, I'd make a coat out of him!"


• On a parrot after the bird mimics his catch phrase "I'm Brian Fellow": "That bird is a liar!"


• On a bat: "I understand bats live in caves", to which the trainer acknowledges yes, "Does he know where Osama bin Laden is?"


• On a pig: "Why does that pig hate Jewish people?" (a reference to kashrut, a Jewish diet that forbids consumption of pork)


• On a Miniature horse: "That's the biggest dog I've ever seen!"


• On a goat: "I didn't like that goat, he had devil eyes!"


• On a turtle: "If that turtle bites me, I'm gonna kill it!"


• On a rabbit: "That rabbit just winked at me!"


• On a porcupine: "That rat needs a hair cut" and "All I'm saying is he needs a haircut. Looking all homeless and stuff."


• On a donkey: "Our next guest has big ears too because he likes to carry coffee beans and rocks. Please welcome a donkey."


• On a cow: "That cow has a big head. I bet he's all stuck up 'cuz of that big head."

"That bird is a liar"

In celebration of post #1234


Brian Fellows Safari Planet: parrot & tarantula