Wouldn't that Bore a Hole in His Head?

"On a Buffalo power play, Thomas Vanek fired a laser beam that found the glass behind the Montreal goal, bounced right back in front over the top of the net, hit Price in the back of the mask and rolled down his back and in."
Source: Plekanec and Price are peerless in victory over Sabres, Friday, February 29, 2008, 10:15 PM ET, CBC Sports

I watched the game on RDS (French TSN). I have no idea where Vanek even got the ray gun from. I personally did not see the laser beam so maybe the sports writer was wearing special infra red glasses. Since the ref was also not wearing infra red glasses could be why no penalty was called. I think the Habs need to petition league officials to review the tapes; shooting laser beams at least deserves a three game suspension. I've seen fans kicked out of rinks for using laser pointers during games so I'd imagine a player using a ray gun would be way worse.

Thomas Vanek and the offending ray gun




Author's Note: Yes, I know I'm ridiculous. Am I any more ridiculous than a man who writes about metaphoric laser beams?